It’s nearing the end of your first date. To kiss or not to kiss?
My first suggestion, is to not go all out. Most first date kisses involve light pecks on the cheeks, perhaps on the lips. These only tend to happen once you feel comfortable with your date – it’s unlikely you’re going to be wanting to go all in when you’ve only just gotten to know eachother. This isn’t a nightclub, you know.
The right time is going to be the most romantically heightened part of the date. When you feel you’re close enough to your new partner, perhaps whilst doing a fun or adventurous part of the date, it would be the best time to think about this.
Alternatively, you might be taking a romantic walk in the park together, strolling along. This could also be another good time to kiss. Try to look into your partners eyes and see what they’re thinking. You’ll feel it if it’s the right time.
The situation doesn’t need to be dramatic and serious to kiss. The right moment to kiss during these sharing moments is when you feel comfortable sharing your personal perceptions and experiences with your date.
At the end of the date, you can give him a light peck on the cheeks if you had fun with him on your first date after he’s dropped you home safe and sound.
The time after the first date can be a very emotional experience. The excitement of what to do next can be racing through someone’s mind. These emotions are magnified even further if the date was a success. This however is a time to slow down and play it cool. The last thing anyone wants to do is scare of a potential Mr or Mrs Right.
There are many excited singles longing to reach for the phone at the first opportunity after having a great time. Getting to know someone doesn’t need to be achieved within a few days, it’s a process that needs to take time. The relationship needs space to breath. A day or two after the first date is a perfect time to collect thoughts, and as they say, absence makes the heart grow fonder. Unless it’s a one night stand you were after, calling again after a couple of days is the right thing to do.
When you do get around to that first phone call remember to stay relaxed and don’t come across as being infatuated. Acting clingy or desperate will just put off the other. Try to get a sense of how the date went for the other person. When the time is right mention how the date went for you, and see what type of response you get. If it’s a positive one you have the option of talking about another date, or playing it cool a little longer. Maybe call them again in another couple of days, but still leave them with the feeling that you are very interested. You don’t want to give them the impression you are not as this could put doubts in their mind or lead them to look elsewhere.
The next call should be about the second date if you haven’t mentioned it in the previous call. Often people these days will be texting or chatting on-line and use this time to set-up the next date. That’s fine, but I do think a call is nice after a successful date. Arrange a quiet place for the date so you can still chat in comfort, and get to know them a bit more.
As the dates progress, adding fun to them can bring two people closer. Trying an activity for the first time like bowling can create some humour. Learn to laugh together, it’s a very romantic emotion. Any activity that has the possibility for a bit of intimate touching is good. Avoid things like the cinema as you can’t talk and can’t interact with the other person. Save that for a 5th or 6th date.
The time after your first date can be an exciting, emotional experience. Remember to relax, play it cool, and don’t come across as being desperate, and everything should run along smoothly.
Technology is moving at an extremely fast pace. It’s constantly making our lives easier, but also more connected. In fact, thanks to technology, one of the biggest venues people are now using to find their significant other is right in front of you, 24/7. Yes, it’s the internet dating phenomenon.
Connection in the love sense can happen anywhere, that’s one of the most exciting things about it. But a lot of people who meet on-line struggle when it comes to moving that relationship they’ve built into the real world.
Thanks to the internet, more and more people are now finding partners – it’s like having every option at your fingertips and you’re no longer restricted to whom you meet at bars or clubs. Every kind of culture, interest, body type and personality is available in someone who’s on-line dating, so there really is someone for everyone.
The problem with on-line dating is that the virtual barrier prevents intimacy from developing right away. People are much more guarded on-line as well, which is probably a good thing! To turn a virtual relationship into a real one, that leap into the real world must occur at the right time and right place.
My advice with on-line dating is to move into the real world as soon as possible, but don’t jump the gun. You must be 100% sure the person is firstly safe, and secondly, worth it. You shouldn’t ever meet someone you feel uncomfortable about, but also there is no point in meeting with them if they’re not the kind of person you’d have dated in the first place anyway. Be realistic when deciding whether someone you met on-line is actually going to turn out to be what you expect.
Feeling prepared? Check you have thought about the answers to the following questions before embarking on your first date. Having unusual or thought-provoking responses might just make you stand out from the crowd!
What do you look for in a guy/girl?
It’s an oldie but a goodie, and everyone is obsessed with asking it to their potential partner. Perhaps because we have this mental check list we want to make sure we meet?
What happened with your last relationship?
Ooh, this one can touch a nerve. But a lot of people want to know what led to you being on the open market and the chances the same fate could happen to them. Who’s responsibility was the breakup, perhaps they’re needy, was there some trust issues, or controlling behaviour…?
What’s the biggest mistake you’ve made with dating?
Perhaps they want to just check you’re not a total idiot.
What’s your #1 tip for success in a relationship?
It’s like they’re expecting something magical. We’ve been over what makes a good relationship, use something from that or think up your own tip. Make sure it’s something you can do!
First dates are full of pressure. Often guys and girls wonder if they are going to “close”, and where things are going to lead.
This is probably a bit further in a guys head than in a girls. The first step, is the first kiss. Look out for the following:
Signs women are interested in a kiss:
- She’s facing you with her arms down and is relaxed
- She tilts her head up towards you
- She parts her mouth gently
- She gazes into your eyes when you talk
- She appears not to be in a hurry for the date to be over
Signs women aren’t interested in a kiss:
- She’s messing with her keys whilst looking down
- Her jaws are tightly clamped shut
- She won’t look you in the eyes
- She shakes your hand or goes in for a hug as she says good night
- Her chin looks like it’s clued to her chest
Signs men are interested in a kiss:
- He appears to be acting nervous (or is nervous!)
- He doesn’t seem to care to leave in a hurry
- He tilts his head towards you and keeps eye contact
- He positions himself in front of you, perhaps a slight block from you moving forward
- He licks his lips (not in a creepy way of course!)
Signs he’s not interested in a kiss:
- He walks straight with you, side by side, without hesitation
- He keeps his hands in his pockets
- He looks down a lot; or looks down at his feet
- He avoids eye contact