nice guy

Getting Yourself Heard – The Nice Guy Problem

People all over the world have taken to on-line dating; and I mean really taken. It’s now a huge, worldwide phenomenon. Because it works; or more accurately, it can work. Women are in general out-numbered by men on on-line dating sites, and they also tend to be the most cautious when it comes to meeting with a guy they’ve met online. And it’s not surprising; there are many horror stories about the things that can occur online. I must say, it’s a good thing to be careful too, I’ve certainly had my fair share of close calls online.

So, how does a nice guy differentiate themselves from the weirdos online? You’re the nice guy looking for their dream girl. All good.

Firstly, be patient. Do not press a girl into handing over more information than she wishes to, or earlier than she wants to. Keep conversations light and fun until the level of comfort is at a point you can take your conversations further. Don’t rush a face-to-face meeting (although don’t leave it too long – no one likes email ping-pong forever).

A picture is worth a thousand words, for real. Make sure your profile has at least three or four pictures (I talk about this elsewhere). Show yourself doing every day activities and make sure they clearly show your face.

Be 100% clear and upfront about your job and hobbies. You’ll get found out eventually, and a good relationship will never be built on lies. You’ll be back at square one before you know it.

Ditto for your physical appearance. Every girl has different likes and wants. Don’t be afraid to be yourself and you won’t get very far if when you meet you have lied about your appearance.

Once you’ve planned to meet for the first time, make sure it’s in a very public place, during daylight hours if possible. You have nothing to hide and nor should she. Once you’ve had a few successful meetings then let the relationship build!

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Sunday’s Top Attraction Myth #8 – Women Are Complicated

Top Attraction Myth #8: Women Are Complicated

Another big myth today. Men think that women are complex. And to some lengths I can see why. We often defy logic and for a lot of men this poses a problem. The thing is, we often take emotion into account more often than men, and this changes things.
Put yourself in a woman’s shoes (not literally) and think about things the way she might. You don’t have to be a cat to understand why a cat might like to chase a bird or claw at that lovely new leather sofa. You’d normally just buy your cat a play-toy or a scratching post and let them be happy.
Lots of guys assume that women work the same as they do, and when they defy this, they get angry or annoyed that things didn’t go how they were expecting.
So, by trying to actually understand what they want and how they think, you’ll be putting yourself in a more powerful position. I’m not saying you have to jump to keep your woman happy all the time, but if you know how to, you can lead a much more happy life!

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Wednesday’s Top Attraction Myth #4 – I’m A Nice Guy

Top Attraction Myth #4: I’m A Nice Guy

Many guys have come to learn this over the course of their teens and probably twenties. So many men think that being the nice guy will lead them where they want with women. Yes, you need to be decent, but I’m afraid if you think that coming across as the soppy “nice guy” you’ll be in her pants then you are far from mistaken.

Women want strength in a man and not just physically, but emotionally. You need to be able to provide for her in the future and keep her secure. You must be confident in your actions and not a doormat. Many men realise as they get older that a lot of their failed relationships were down to them trying to perpetually be this super nice person and in the end they just were walked over. If that’s you, then sort it out – pronto.

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What attracts Women to Men, and why Being the Nice Guy isn’t always best…

Men are often clueless in what it is that attracts a woman. In fact, some people say that women are so hard to comprehend that even if a man could master how to understand every portion of their body language, they’d still not be able to understand them.

Over 70% of Men can’t work out the most basic of women’s body language

Because men are having such a hard time figuring out what attracts women sexually and romantically, men often realise that they’ve misunderstood or completely got the wrong end of the stick, often too late. This leads to many men thinking they know the secret of what women are attracted to, when in fact they couldn’t be further from it.

So, here’s some quick tips. Women, if you agree/disagree don’t forget to share in the comments section below!

Here’s a list of the top tips to help understand where men are going wrong:

  1. Women don’t like “nice guys”

    Well, they do, but that doesn’t mean it’s what attracts them. Some guys think that in order to attract a woman they must be good looking, small good, dress well and project that all so important “nice guy” image. WRONG. In reality, women are after the bad-boys. They always have been and they always are. Nice guys are boring. It’s as simple as that – and women find this uninteresting.

    Women enjoy character. They value someone who can keep them hooked. Most women value personality over looks, correct, but that doesn’t mean you need to roll over and play nice. Men who have loveable personalities with a sense of humour and above all confidence tend to do the best.

  2. Women are attracted to less superficial features than men are
    Let me explain. Women tend to see past the surface quicker than men do. Things that are innate, and not constrained by physical boundaries and limitations. Women are far more concerned with things that they literally cannot see. Stuff like personality traits, behaviour and attitudes.

    This is why most women would rather date a man with a strong personality, even if he isn’t the best looking or most well off.

  3. Women like men who can handle themselves
    Egoistic men tend to be more focussed on what others see in them than who they actually are.
    However, women are not so much worried about what makes this man, but on what this man makes of himself. For example, women prefer men who take care of what they’ve got than are perhaps the most naturally good looking.

    A man might be rich, but if he spends his money unwisely then he won’t necessarily bag the woman of his dreams. Women prefer men who do the right thing, who make the most of what they have… This is the key to getting women to pay attention.

    Material things such as looks, physical attributes, wealth, education, power, etc are all important, but it doesn’t mean every man needs this to be successful with women. Men who have less, but do more with it, will always win.

So with all this in mind, remember that the concept of attraction is a personal one and will vary from woman to woman. One woman may like the fact you have a car, one may not care. But to be successful with the majority of women you need to focus on proving that what you do with what you’ve got is more important to you than having the best material things to start from.

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